In response to a challenge...

[zhilbar]

Torches kindled to life on either side of the great hall, throwing flickering shadows over the solid gold floor, the bejeweled walls, the vaulted and frescoed ceiling, but most of all upon the paintings lining each wall. Some seemed prosaic, a bastion of normality in a place where strangeness roamed free; some geometric, a beautiful series of interacting polyhedrons from floor to high ceiling; some excised, as if the painter had used colors the mortal eye could not percieve; some horrific, as if to view them for too long a time would cause the shackles binding a man's sanity to slip and let madness run free...

::Lord Zhilbar appeared without fanfare in the entryway, along with His guest.:: He offered her a seat, and they prepared for the contest that lay before them...

Comments

[leela1.livejournal.com]

Leela gasped in wonder, longed to touch the walls, get close to the colors, the shapes. She looked up, could barely see the figures painted high above her - swirling colors overhead causing her eyes to itch. She smiled at the Dragon God, then shook her head, remembering why they were there.

She took the seat, and mentally readied herself for the contest of wills ahead. He was a dragon, she was a girl. He was 14,000 years old, she was *ahum* legal. He was about three hundred feet tall, she was 5 ft 4. He weighted several hundred pounds - she was one hundred and seven pounds, soaking wet.

All in all, a pretty fair fight.

Thank you, Zhilbar. And since you asked earlier, I pick - truth.

[zhilbar.livejournal.com]

*Soundlessly notes to Leela that He weighed several hundred "tons," but doesn't make a big deal about it*

Very well, then tell Me:

Why you dislike being called "cute" so much, when"gorgeous," "ravishing," "beautiful," "charming," and other such superlatives don't spark any response at all?

[leela1.livejournal.com]

Easy. Cute is what carebears and kittens are. Children are cute. Babies are cute.

Cute is - harmless, and easily beaten. Cute is little, not able take care of itself.

"Cute" needs to be protected.

[zhilbar.livejournal.com]

Hmm..

So you don't mind being thought attractive, but would wish to be thought formidable as well? You feel that being referred to as "cute" is a denigration of your self-sufficient nature?

I can see where this would be irritating.

Your turn.

[leela1.livejournal.com]

Not formidable - but at least self-sufficient. 'Cute' really doesn't get alot of respect.

When did you realize you were a God?

[zhilbar.livejournal.com]

When I first became one, of course.

I was roughly 2,500 years old, and had spent most of that life in "trying" circumstances. Due to My refusal to give in, I managed to pull out of the most horrific scenarios victorious, and a will of steel with the reputation for it as well.

I wandered the worlds, doing right as best I could see it, gathering knowledge, and seeking out a pantheon that might have an opening...

I eventually found one headed by a God named Nunnthrak. He was head God of His pantheon, and his entire world bows down to Him. He tried to give Me the most pathetic and useless domain He could think of, and thus did I go into training to be God of Puddings.

Does this answer your question?

[leela1.livejournal.com]

*taking it all in*

Yep. Your turn.

Truth or dare.

[zhilbar.livejournal.com]

*Considers briefly, then grins slightly*

Dare.

[leela1.livejournal.com]

I dare you..*she looks around the room* to ah, ummmm..*looks up at him, snaps her fingers*

I dare you to assume your most human form - with comparable height and weight - for the duration of this contes, the entire contest.

[zhilbar.livejournal.com]

My "most" human form? Well, be careful what you wish for, Milady...

*Shimmers, shrinking and shifting into the form shown in His icon*

Picked this one up in a university, as I was simply enthralled by this one's mustache. I feel it could fly off of his face and live by dining on insects, did it so choose...

I assume that this goes for all My avatars, here, the Nexus, and elsewhere?

((Gotta love Google.))

[leela1.livejournal.com]

*started giggling*

If that's the way you want to be for the duration of the entire contest, so be it.

Your choice.

And your turn.

[zhilbar.livejournal.com]

Well, a dare is a dare..

And thus I dare you to sing all three verses of "I"m Henry The Eighth, I Am" for Me... Mainly because I quite wish to hear you sing that.

[leela1.livejournal.com]

*starts having a gigglefit, puts head down on table*

*raises head, starts singing softly*

I'm Henry the eighth I am
Henry the eighth I am, I am
I got married to the widow next door
She's been married seven times before
And every one was an Henry (Henry)
She wouldn't have a Willy or a Sam (no Sam)
I'm her eighth old man, I'm Henry
Henry the eighth I am

Second verse same as the first getting a little louder now, starting to get into the tune*

I'm Henry the eighth I am
Henry the eighth I am, I am
I got married to the widow next door
She's been married seven times before
And every one was an Henry (Henry)
She wouldn't have a Willy or a Sam (no Sam)
I'm her eighth old man, I'm Henry
Henry the eighth I am begins belting it out

I'm Henry the eighth I am
Henry the eighth I am, I am
I got married to the widow next door
She's been married seven times before
And every one was an Henry (Henry)
She wouldn't have a Willy or a Sam (no Sam)
I'm her eighth old man, I'm Henry
Henry the eighth I am

H-E-N-R-Y
Henry (Henry)
Henry (Henry)
Henry the eighth I am, I am
Henry the eighth I am

Yeah!

[zhilbar.livejournal.com]

*Applauds*

Now THAT'S how it's supposed to sound!

[leela1.livejournal.com]

*grins*

Are we on truth or dare now?

And who's turn is it?

[zhilbar.livejournal.com]

Your turn.

Truth or dare?

((Just off the cuff, but I found out that I can type "Zhilbar" in on Google and get 64 results, all Me, and ONE IN JAPANESE. Sorry for tooting My own horn, but that is AWESOME!))

[leela1.livejournal.com]

Um, truth. My throat is still dry from singing that song.

Oh and, you did say corsets - right?


((that is soooo cool! Way to go!))

[zhilbar.livejournal.com]

Corsets indeed, My lady. Quite becoming.


Very well, and mind you, if you hesitate or don't know, you shall be cast into the Gorge of Eternal Peril.

What have been the five most amusing moments of your life?

[leela1.livejournal.com]

First amusing moment: When I was around ten, my Dad took me to the zoo and we saw the monkeys doing...um, things they didn't have listed. My Dad was SO embarrassed...more than me. I thought it was funny.

My second amusing moment: When I was seventeen I crashed this wedding reception, told them I was a close friend of the bride - who was wasted by the way, and thought she remembered me. I ended up having a blast, got treated like a queen, food, drinks, phone numbers from the best man - the works. I'd never met any of them before in my life. And I never saw any of them again.

My third most amusing moment: Seeing the look on my friend Ted's face when I took off my shirt and went topless swimming. I'd never seen someone turn so red so fast. But he's really sweet, and I didn't want to hurt his feelings - so I pretended not to notice until he got himself under control again.

My forth? When I ate some of Hermes chocolate, and it changed my sex from female to male, and I realized that I was a guy - and a virgin.

And the fifth amusing moment? The other day - watching all the fangirls attempt to glomp all over a certain Dragon God in the middle of a busy street in Vegas Nevada - and the locals just walked by like they saw it all the time.

Who knows, maybe they do.

There you go.

[zhilbar.livejournal.com]

*Chuckles with jollity, considering the moments to be charmingly reminiscient of the young lady herself*

Splendid! And what would you care to ask in return?

((Note: No power other than Zhilbar's can effect you in His realm, lest they are more powerful than He... And Misery doesn't fit that bill.))

[leela1.livejournal.com]

Now, my question for you is...

Why did you pick Emily to marry?

[zhilbar.livejournal.com]

*blinks*

My, that certainly is personal. Ah, well.

It isn't all that complicated, really.

Ori set her sister up, (http://www.livejournal.com/community/sages_of_chaos/856732.html) and... well... I was still dealing with the dregs of an Ebay habit, and was rather lonely. I wished to have someone to share My life with again, and the timing seemed perfect. I admit, My somewhat quirky sense of humor was a major determining factor... I wanted to see the look on the face of the female in question.

When first we met, (http://www.livejournal.com/community/sages_of_chaos/865548.html) it seemed a bad beginning... But I became quite intrigued with what I was learning of her. I haven't seen her around much, but she seems to be coming to the Nexus somewhat more often. I do hope she sees Me as more than just a glorified "sugar-daddy," but I suppose only time will out!

Any thoughts?

[leela1.livejournal.com]

I don't think you are a glorified sugar daddy to her. In fact, I think that she's perhaps feeling protective of you.

That implies actual caring - more than just material goods involved, I think.

[zhilbar.livejournal.com]

*Pleased* She has been? Wonderful! I think this could be something grand!

In any case, care for continuance?

[leela1.livejournal.com]

Please. Let us continue. Truth or dare?